People can sometimes waste a large part of their life in the present with the notion of wanting to find their true self and ignore/avoid whatever they have in the present or what they really want to really do now. No need to overthink, go hunting to a different world or beat yourself up etc. You just need to follow the trail of your feelings to reach your stable self and not beat around the bush. I personally and honestly believe that any individual whose in an identity crisis, knows what he/she wants deep within, but either are scared to admit it or go ahead with it!
And, it really annoys me when people know what they want to do/feel like doing, but don’t do it because of some reason and then obsess over finding themselves. I mean you obviously won’t find yourself if you don’t let yourself do what you really want to do.
- What makes you happy? What do you enjoy doing? (apart from the times you haven’t been able to enjoy it because of being distressed by some issues). Often people don’t want to do the things they usually enjoy doing because of how they stopped enjoying doing them in the past due to having bad moods or something.
- What are your regrets?– what are the things you wish you’d done. They can tell you so much about what you desire and aspire. Forgive those past regrets and start afresh.
- What makes you envious?– what makes you tick when you see other? What are the things that make you truly feel “oh! I could’ve done that!” or “that could’ve been me/mine” If you can’t figure out what you directly want, this is a good way of understanding your true inner desires. That part about people is what you see yourself being/doing (or desiring to do).
- What are your current desires? Is it working on that new project, embracing that new opportunity, traveling in the next holidays?
By simply just doing what makes you feel happy in the present, you can trace yourself back to your true self and don’t have to think of this concept in abstract and ambiguous terms terms.
Obviously, pursuing the above may not actually be practical sometimes because one has to deal with environmental and societal challenges, however, one has to figure out their own way of dealing with those challenges to emerge victorious at the end of the day. That part may be a struggle, but the journey is worth the challenge since one can learn life skills like negotiation, bargaining, diminishing the ego & compromise, sticking up for their beliefs at the right time etc.