Why you shouldn’t punish yourself for results

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Not everyone harms themselves through self- cutting or overt means, but some of us (who are perfectionists) do it in a covert subtle way. We also believe that it helps us enhance our abilities.

Self Harm doesn’t actually help you because:

  1. Your abilities, talents, creativity etc is a function of your interests, passions and positive seeking. Self harming tendencies only take you back, make you complacent, dependent or make you sabotage the same interests. The same activity done without a self punishing tendency will be much more long term, sustained and enjoyable.
  2. Positive coping mechanisms lead to an expansion/ enhancing of life skills and manifestation of skills and abilities like creativity and talent. Negative copings like self beating, fixating etc lead to further life conditions and stagnancy in your progress, while the increase in abilities is a function of positive coping.
  3. If it’s the artists, musicians and celebrities who’re inspiring you to go into this habit for achieving results, please look at the statistic of how many of the same do not have self harm/mental issues. It’s not necessary to have these tendencies to be creative. Also, a lot of people with self harm tendencies don’t have any special talents, creativities or abilities have mental illness as well.
  4. Hence, don’t attribute your interest, talents and the good parts about your personality to your self harming tendencies. They are a function of your innate intelligence, potential and curiosity.

We end up having extremely negative self images and beat ourselves up for our mistakes. Spiritually, this has the following consequences:

  1. Fixating on your mistakes gives you a deluded self image and going by the LOA, you will end up making more mistakes and not grow. You will just get more confused about your identity. Focus on your positive qualities as well.
  2. Whatever loss you have incurred, cope/deal with that. Punishing yourself is not a solution.
  3. You are giving yourself way too much importance. Reduce your arrogance.
  4. It will only make you depend on the activity for happiness and self esteem even more. Plus, that’s not who you are if you need self harm to do it. Find your true self hence.
  5. It will cloud your judgement, make you ignore your wisdom and you’ll make life decisions that don’t reflect what you truly want to do.
  6. You will not grow at your own pace and feel uncomfortable with who you are in the end.
  7. It won’t help you develop inner strength, and make you weak and even codependent in relationships. You will not have joy or personal satisfaction in the long run.

What if you’ve already done it?

That’s honestly fine because that was your decision then and that’s what you wanted to do with the wisdom you had at that time. Today is a different day and you can chose to do things differently now, based on what you’re comfortable with.

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