It often happens that you’re in an identity crisis and don’t know how to see/view yourself anymore. The past is constantly on your mind and your self image is disturbed. In this case, I think it’s best to take action in the present while simultaneously give yourself time to introspect.
- List out the things you enjoyed/liked doing and the things you didn’t like doing- but not in terms of a career! Just in terms of what you liked doing in a daily sense.
What you liked doing could be- going out, eating, dancing, tv etc.
What you didn’t like could be- xyz whatever.
You can figure out a way to not do or manage/accept what you didn’t like doing if its a responsibility in the present and balance it out with doing things that you enjoy doing.
2. What you don’t like about yourself- weaknesses that can be worked on
What you do like about yourself- who/what you are
Take out the good parts and leave the bad parts out. Work on weaknesses or accept yourself with them.
3. Pick out the times in the past that you’ve lied to yourself. Those were the times you weren’t yourself. But maybe you’ve grown into liking those things now so keep that into account.
Either way you do what you want to now in the present moment without worrying/caring about how you did it earlier. If you sabotage yourself in the present, you’ll lose yourself further.
4. Accept all the decisions you made in the past, whatever has/had happened, including the ones you regret. Then, think of the past as what you would’ve wanted it to be (LOA) and use the good memories from the past as secret shifters. Have gratitude for them and see life change.
That’s how you can reconstruct your identity and slowly start looking at the past without regrets.